Friday, May 25, 2012

A Trip to the Mall...And the Elevator

My mom and I went to the mall today and I was excited. Mom willingly going to the mall is rare because she hates shopping (unlike me who would blow all of my money if I had my way :) ). We were going upstairs and headed towards the elevator. We saw that the elevator was out of order and we both sighed. I realize that to other people, this would be no big deal and they would just take the escalator but to someone who can't walk, it's slightly annoying. Mom and I wandered around Macy's, trying to find an elevator. They had one but it only went up and down the levels of that store, not the mall levels themselves. Even though it was irritating, I was still having fun and looking around. Finally, a friendly guard showed us another mall elevator. He was so nice. He's probably a cool grandpa. 

After our mini adventure, we continued our shopping. I got things like a pink and black skull book bag and an Edward Cullen t-shirt from Hot Topic. It was a very good day but the reason why I wrote this entry is to tell all malls to make sure all of their elevators are working. Handicapped people and their caregivers depend on them.   

Tuesday, May 15, 2012


By: Lena Holdman

There was once a young woman who was perfectly imperfect;
a woman who was eccentrically, beautifully different.
Though everyone loved her,
they would pick out her mistakes and scold her like a child!
She was supposed to act naïve, innocent, obedient;
wear white not black.
She was expected to be concerned about what they think and jump when they said so.
She felt like an overused, broken toy.

Finally one day, she said: “I have my own mind!
Everyone has flaws,
Why do you have to pick at mine to the bone?
I’m not your puppet or slave,
I don’t have to do what anyone says!”

Then she just continued to yell: “You better burn me, this defiant witch, at the stake now,
for I’ll just do what you won’t allow.
There is no way in hell that you’ll change how I feel,
This is me, so shut up and deal!” 

(c)Lena Holdman, all rights reserved 2012

This is about rebellion and I was sort of venting a little. The song above is "Acting Out" by Ashley Tisdale. 

Saturday, May 12, 2012

I'm A Poet!

I’m a poet!
I’ll say what I should and what I shouldn’t!
When I’m here with my pen and paper, I reveal what’s in my heart;
Be it sad, be it filled with rage, or be it joyful,
I’m always truthful.
With emotions passionate, unsugar-coated, raw,
I’ll give it my all!
This is who I am,
If others don’t like it,
I don’t give a damn!
There’s nothing they say or do about it,
I’ll die a poet!!! 

(c)Lena Holdman, all rights reserved 2012 

This is about my passion for writing poetry. :)

Thursday, May 3, 2012

Scattered Rainbows

It’s a sunny, calm afternoon. We’re sitting on top of a spacious hill looking over the huge school building. The spring grass has been freshly cut and is the lightest green. The sky is brightest blue and the dazzling sun is shining through the fluffy clouds with all types of colors surrounding them. The warm sun is also hitting our faces, giving me a sense of peace. We’re supposed to be at school in math class but you always have ways to make me break some of the rules.

Since the fifth grade, you, Patrick Healings and I, Rebecca Gullveig have been practically attached to the hip. We did everything together and swore to be best friends forever. You didn’t care that I had cerebral palsy and was in a wheelchair, and I didn’t care that you had dyslexia and sometimes needed help with reading. We took care of each other. It was us against the world.  Back then you were like an older brother but now we’re older and in ninth grade. I’ve secretly began to feel more deeper feelings for you than just friendship and noticing other things about you; things like your incredible smile that makes my stomach fill up with butterflies, your forget-me-not blue eyes that light up like fireworks when you laugh, the way you always want to protect me, and the warmth and tightness of your embrace when we hug. I haven’t told you yet of course but my feelings have been getting stronger every day.

Now we’re dancing playfully on the hill with you twirling, dipping my wheelchair. Sometimes it feels like I’ll tip over at any moment but you catch me each time. I know that you won’t let anything bad happen to me. My heart is racing and I’m laughing loudly. As you continue to spin me around, I see a surreal and remarkable sight in the sky. Appearing out of nowhere, there are mini, individual, radiant rainbows scattered randomly across the sky. Each rainbow has shades of red, blue, green, violet, and pink and has a cotton ball-like cloud at their end. I’m in shock and awe. You’ve stopped spinning me to gaze up at them as well. The town hasn’t seen a drop of rain today so seeing any rainbow at all is considered peculiar but seeing so many at once is just completely bizarre.

“They are so beautiful,” I muse breathlessly.

“They sure are,” you agree.

“It looks like we’ll have a very strange spring this year,” I smile.

“Hey Rebecca, do you have a date for the spring dance on Friday?” you ask, changing the subject abruptly. I’m taken aback a little by the question.

“No, why?” I reply calmly, trying to ignore the leaping heart in my chest.

“I’m going to ask Kelsey Maurelle to the dance and I was hoping that you and I could double date, that’s all,” you explain. 

Kelsey Maurelle is so mean to you but you refuse to see it. She teases you behind your back (I’ve defended you more than once) and she never acknowledges you unless she wants money for lunch. She knows that you like her and she uses it to her full advantage. Still, you think that she’s an absolute angel. I see one of the rainbows to the right go dim and its cloud darken slightly at the mention of her name. I hold back laughter. Instead of getting catty and listing all of the reasons why you shouldn't ask her, I tell a little white lie.

“Patrick, I think that I heard some guy ask her already before biology today,” I tell you.

“I bet that it was that Stephen guy, wasn’t it?” you sigh. I just shrug my shoulders. 

“I’m so sorry,” I say softly. You look so disappointed that I’m wondering if I did the right thing.

“It’s alright,” you sigh again, “I didn’t have a chance in hell with her anyway.”

“That’s not true…,” I say, hating the discouraged look on your face and for some reason, also loathing the rainbow that is getting darker now, on the verge of being purely black.    

Then an idea comes to me. I say, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible, “Hey, I have a crazy idea. Why don’t you and I go to the dance instead?”

“Together?” you ask.

“Yeah, why not?” I reply with humor, “You’re cooler than any other guy at school. Do you really want me just to take a loser that I barely know?”

You chuckle and still smiling, you say, “No and I guess that you’re the coolest girl I know, so sure, let’s go to the dance and party!”

“Awesomeness,” I smile. We then both laugh at ourselves. When I look at the rainbow on the right again, it’s brightening up once more. I feel beyond giddy about going to the dance with you but I hide it. Just then, the school bell for the end of that hour rings in the distance.

“We better head back before we get caught,” I say.

“Okay,” you agree. We gaze up at the abnormal rainbows for a moment again before leaving. Then you go behind me to help me down the hill. As we head towards the school, the rainbows slowly disappear except for one. It’s the one rainbow on the right. It suddenly begins to grow large and its astonishing colors expand over us and we go under it like a bridge. 

The rainbow won’t leave after that day. It’s there for the rest of our high school years, it’s there when our friendship turns into true love, it’s there for our wedding, and it’s there for us to show our children. People say that there’s a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow but we’ve had something more precious than gold. I believe that love can be found underneath a magical rainbow or anywhere else people least expect.

(c)Lena Holdman, all rights reserved 2012

This is based off a dream that I had the other morning. :)