Feel Good Time

Every late night, I see a lot of commercials for food and new gadgets. I don't know how many times that I craved something greasy and fating at midnight (damn Arby's, lol) but some commercials touch my heart. I'll be waiting for Criminal Minds or Archie's Weird Mysteries to come back on when I get all teary-eyed with the biggest smile on my face. Sometimes, (this might sound incredibly cheesy, I know), I see the most up-lifting messages. Here's some examples.  :-)

Diversity & Inclusion – Love Has No Labels 

Special Athlete 





Already There 





Wonderful World





If you weren't moved in the slightest, you're not human! :-)

Dark Reboot of "Power Rangers"

The video above is "POWER/RANGERS", a short film by Joseph Kahn. It's a dark version of "Mighty Morphin Power Rangers." I loved Power Rangers as a kid and I admit that I still watch it sometimes. When I heard about this film, my first thought was:"Oh great, another show from my childhood is ruined!" I usually don't like things from my childhood to be rewritten or changed like the time when Disney made a creepy video game or like when I seen that Rainbow Brite had been turned into an anime cartoon. I get ridiculously angry (lol) but I watched this video out of curiosity. As I was watching, I was amazed. Even though it was dark and gory, I liked it. I might have even watched this as a full-length movie. Power Rangers isn't ruined. This short film just had a darker plot than the 90's show but I wouldn't suggest letting kids watch it though. It would be a rated 'R' movie.   

Victim is Surviving "Slender Man" Attack

The Remarkable Recovery of the Girl Stabbed 19 Times for 'Slender Man'

By: Jennifer O'Neillhttps://www.yahoo.com/parenting/the-remarkable-recovery-of-the-girl-stabbed-19-111491144782.html?soc_src=mags&soc_trk=copy 

Payton Leutner. Photo by ABC News

Less than a year after Payton Leutner was savagely stabbed 19 times, allegedly by her best friend and another girl, and left for dead in the woods, the 13-year-old is enjoying the best revenge — living — and happily at that. “She’s not a victim,” the Leutner family’s hired spokesperson, Stephen Lyons, tells Yahoo Parenting. “She’s a survivor. There’s a big difference.”

From the early days of her recovery, Payton, of the Waukesha, Wis., has shown remarkable resilience. When her mother, Stacie Leutner, asked how she managed to crawl out of the trees and onto a paved path where a cyclist found her and called 911 that horrific May 31 morning, she simply replied, “Because I wanted to live,” Stacie told ABC News’ “20/20”.

 Morgan Geyser. Photo by Abe Van Dyke/Corbis

The then-12-year-old — who just celebrated her birthday on Friday — had been blindsided by the shocking attack. It took place the morning after a sleepover at pal Morgan Geyser’s, along with Morgan’s friend Anissa Weier, both 12 at the time. The duo allegedly lured Payton into the woods by telling her they were going to play hide-and-seek, then they tried to murder her, viciously stabbing her with a five-inch-long kitchen knife and wounding her arms, legs, diaphragm, liver, stomach, and chest. “If the knife had gone the width of a human hair further [to penetrate her heart], she wouldn’t have lived,” Payton’s surgeon John Keleman told “20/20.” 

The girls, both in custody and charged with first-degree attempted homicide, had reportedly planned the attack for months in a disturbing attempt to gain favor with — and reprieve for their families from — the fictional horror story kidnapper “Slender Man,” whom Payton says the two believed was real. Geyser, since diagnosed as schizophrenic, appeared in court Tuesday with Weier for preliminary hearings regarding their case. A judge has yet to determine whether or not to green light them for trial next month. The girls have been charged as adults, but Fox6Now reports that Geyser’s attorney is attempting to have them tried in juvenile court instead. 

Joe and Stacie Leutner. Photo by ABC News

“I think the hardest part for me is that Payton put this trust in this girl,” Stacie, who also has a younger son, Caden, told “20/20.” “And Morgan knew that she was going to do this to Payton that night. She knew, and to betray somebody like that and to hurt somebody like that… Both of my kids have been robbed of their innocence. No child should ever have to go through something like this. Payton did, and now those closest to her say that she’s come out the other side stronger for it. “I’m astonished at the way that she’s been able to recover,” her father, Joe Leutner, added in the same interview. 

Still, it’s been a draining process, Lyons tells Yahoo Parenting. Payton spent her summer in and out of surgeries, doctor appointments, and therapy sessions before reporting back to school to begin junior high in September. “She is an amazing young lady,” says Lyons. “She has an incredibly brave heart. She and the entire family are an inspiration. Despite all the things they’ve gone through, their attitude is still just to think that tomorrow will be a better day.” 

In fact, the family considers itself lucky. “At the end of the day, their little girl wakes up in her bed with her dog and two cats and her gecko and they’re all together,” says Lyons. “Payton’s doing great, too, in school, which she loves. This is just one chapter in a very long book for them.”


The resilience Payton has displayed thus far tells family physician and parenting expert Deborah Gilboa, MD, that the teen’s future is bright indeed. “What she endured is not something she’ll have to recover from every day for the rest of her life,” Gilboa tells Yahoo Parenting. “It will inform her perspective,” she says, but not define her. “In some ways, this horrible thing that happened will strengthen the resilience she’s already shown and make her life so much better,” she says. “She can use this terrible experience to have a great life.

Joe has already declared his little girl is built for big things. He told “20/20” that his daughter, for whom they’ve established Go Fund Me and Hearts for Healing fundraisers to cover future treatments, is “meant to do something really special.”
My thoughts: I think that it's ridiculous that someone tried to stab this girl over a fictional killer. I love Creepypasta and Slender Man is a popular Creepypasta character but I know that it's just an online urban legend. If you don't  know the difference between fiction and reality, you really shouldn't listen to these kind of stories in the first place. I heard that some blamed Mr. Creepypasta for what those girls did, which is also dumb. He's just the storyteller. My thoughts and prayers go out to Payton and her family. Keep your chin up, Payton and keep smiling. I'm happy that you're recovering.

V-Day

V-Day 

My name is Wendy Kyle. It was always a never-ending, dark battle with my so-called friends, Gerald and Tiffany Wicci. One moment, we were like a close second family and then in a blink of an eye, they were my worse enemies. Hateful words were their weapons of choice. When we would fight, they would point out my every flaw and put salt on old wounds until I was a spineless jellyfish.  I was always walking on egg shells around them and tried to do everything to keep them happy. Even when I was five, when we first met, I had to prove myself worthy to be their friend.

When I met them, I think that they were already child sociopaths despite what the experts might say. I was the new girl and the youngest at school, having trouble making friends. I had knotted, red hair and an embarrassing gap between my teeth. I was also overly shy, sensitive, and submissive. I felt like everyone hated me and I was easily picked on. One day, our teacher Ms. Ploster left the room for a moment during art time. On my way getting my paint, I caught six-year-old sister and brother, Tiffany and Gerald drawing all over on the classroom walls. I gasped in shock and Tiffany quickly turned around to face me.

She smiled mischievously and said in a fake nice tone, “Wanna help us?” She handed me a red crayon and Gerald smiled knowingly back at Tiffany. I knew that it was wrong but I thought that they were being friendly. I took the crayon and timidly drew a heart on the wall. Footsteps were approaching and I fearfully looked over my shoulder. They told me that it was no one but when I wasn’t looking, they ran away.

“Wendy,” exclaimed Ms. Ploster, “Did you do all of this?!” I looked around and I saw Gerald and Tiffany hiding in the corner.

Gerald mouthed, “Do you want to be our friend or not?” I stared at them for a second. To a naïve child, they seemed kind. I was so desperate for some friends that I ignored the wicked twinkle in their eyes and made a stupid decision.

“Yes,” I told Ms. Ploster, “I did it.” I was sent to the principal’s office, was made to clean the walls, and even my mom and dad grounded me from the television for a week but I thought that Gerald and Tiffany were my friends now.

Years later in junior high and high school, they made me do more serious and dangerous things with them like robbing a gas station, when Tiffany gave an innocent, sickly man a heart attack by injecting with adrenaline, and dealing drugs, when Gerald almost shot me with a gun for crying and being scared. Gerald even took me to the Valentine’s Day dance as an award for helping them rob an elderly woman in which her helpless husband got hurt. Even though we never got caught for these horrible things, I was expected to take all of the blame for it if we did and keep my mouth shut.

I knew that these things were wrong but I was their puppet and they pulled every string. I sometimes got the guts to say no to them but they put me through hell for it. Playing with my insecurities, they completely tore down my self-esteem by saying that I was nothing but shit without them. They both also would beat me to a bloody pulp then shunned me for about a month, not talking to me, not even acknowledging that we were ever friends. Despite my efforts to remain strong, the loneliness would always become too overwhelming and eventually I would cave in. We would go back to normal and of course, I would never tell about their ongoing abuse. My parents thought that I just fell a lot.

Now, I was twenty-one. I was going to college, working on a creative writing major and an art major.  Gerald and Tiffany went to school for a semester and just dropped out. Now they both worked at the general store. Since the first day of college, I was focused and constantly worked on homework. I’ve had too busy to tag along with them and began to have the courage to say no more and more. College gave me confidence and I was growing up. I expected to have a big fight with them but surprisingly they tolerated my absence. Things seemed to be changing…well, that was until Valentine’s Day. 

It was a bitter cold Valentine’s Day with snowflakes violently blowing in my face. I was walking to their house while on my way to the library. I was just dropping off the Valentine’s Day gifts that I got them. I didn’t know why I bought them gifts. I was beginning to resent them and just wanted to fade away from their lives but I guess that old habits die hard. When I got there, it was as though they were waiting for me and they made me sit down for a while. Looking around, I noticed that we were alone. At first, we were just casually talking but then both of their faces became ominous.  

“Life has been miserable for us, Wendy,” said Tiffany with fake sadness.

“Why?” I asked uncomfortably.

“Cause our dumb parents won’t give us extra money,” sneered Gerald, “so I was thinking that you could help us rob…”

“No,” I said firmly, standing up and not even letting him finish, “I’m not robbing anyone, any place anymore. I can let borrow some money. How much do you guys need?” Before I knew what happening, Gerald slapped me across the cheek with incredible force, making me fall back.

“Watch your damn mouth,” he shouted, “We’re still your friends, college girl, and you’ll do what we say, got it?”

Fighting back my stinging tears, I said defiantly, “No I won’t and I don’t know if we were ever friends.”

He then practically pounced upon me and punched me in the face while Tiffany was off to the side, kicking me in the ribs. I tried to get away but Gerald pinned me down. “You ungrateful, selfish…,” they both spat at me as they beat me, “…weak, useless, dumb little skank!” Blood was gushing excessively from my face and my whole body was in total agony but I wouldn’t let them see me cry. I wasn’t that pathetic girl anymore. Their eyes looked so empty, so evil. Seeing deep into their toxic souls, something finally snapped within me and amazing strength filled me.

I kneed Gerald hard in the groin and pushed Tiffany down with a free hand in one move. They both howled in pain. I got to my feet and ran into the kitchen. I never thought that I could fight that way. It was like a kickass superhero possessed my body. While her brother was still screaming in pain, Tiffany chased after me but I tackled her to the kitchen floor. Straddling her, I punched her repeatedly in the face, in the ribs, in the head; blood squirting out everywhere and her bones making a sickening crushing sound. She was too bleeding uncontrollably and couldn’t move for a moment. Then, I stood up and got a butcher knife from the block, the metal making a loud scraping sound. I wasn’t just trying to escape anymore; now I wanted revenge. They wouldn’t stop me, they couldn’t stop me. Gerald now stood up and came at me but to his absolute shock, the minute that he came close, I shoved the blade into his gut.

“This…stops…here,” I said in a low, confident tone.

Coughing up blood, he stumbled back and fell onto the ground. Tiffany screamed and tried feebly to attack me once more but I punched her down again. She was now weeping over her brother. He wasn’t dead yet, only badly injured and bleeding profusely. Without saying another word, I pulled out the blade from him and calmly washed my hands, my face, and the knife at the sink. Then, putting the knife back in the block, I silently went upstairs, changing out of my blood-stained clothes and into Tiffany's clothes. Once changed, I headed towards the front door. 

“Where are you going?” asked Tiffany. I ignored her and kept on walking.

“Are you going to help us?” Tiffany asked hysterically, “Are you coming back with help?”

As I continued to walk out of the kitchen, I smiled and said sardonically, “Don’t hold your breath.”

I then walked out of their house, out into freedom and not ever knowing or caring what had become of them. Their strings on me were finally cut. I threw away my blood clothes into the library's dumpster. I wasn’t even worried about them telling the police on me because if they told, the police would eventually find out what they did to me and what they made me do.

(c)Lena Holdman, all rights reserved 2012/2015

I originally wrote this a couple of years ago but I edited it and added onto it tonight because I was in an editing mood and I always thought that it needed more. It's a creepy, gory Valentine's tonight, Kiddies! ;) 

Anti-Valentine's Day...Let's turn it into a second Halloween!

I'm usually not a cynical person. I love the gifts from my family but there are so many reasons why I loathe Valentine's Day like: the fact that it's a completely commercial holiday, the annoying way that some people always ask me about my relationship status on this day, and the fact that most of my so-called boyfriends in the past decided to end things on or near Valentine's Day. I tried not to be bitter this year and looked up the origins of this day so I could understand why people celebrate it.  This is what I found. 

 One legend contends that Valentine was a priest who served during the third century in Rome. When Emperor Claudius II decided that single men made better soldiers than those with wives and families, he outlawed marriage for young men. Valentine, realizing the injustice of the decree, defied Claudius and continued to perform marriages for young lovers in secret. When Valentine’s actions were discovered, Claudius ordered that he be put to death. 

Other stories suggest that Valentine may have been killed for attempting to help Christians escape harsh Roman prisons, where they were often beaten and tortured. According to one legend, an imprisoned Valentine actually sent the first “valentine” greeting himself after he fell in love with a young girl–possibly his jailor’s daughter–who visited him during his confinement. Before his death, it is alleged that he wrote her a letter signed “From your Valentine,” an expression that is still in use today. 
http://www.history.com/topics/valentines-day/history-of-valentines-day 

It deals with a lot of death but it's still romantic, right? 

Then I scrolled down and found a darker origin, which makes me think that V-Day should be a second Halloween. 

 While some believe that Valentine’s Day is celebrated in the middle of February to commemorate the anniversary of Valentine’s death or burial–which probably occurred around A.D. 270–others claim that the Christian church may have decided to place St. Valentine’s feast day in the middle of February in an effort to “Christianize” the pagan celebration of Lupercalia. Celebrated at the ides of February, or February 15, Lupercalia was a fertility festival dedicated to Faunus, the Roman god of agriculture, as well as to the Roman founders Romulus and Remus.

To begin the festival, members of the Luperci, an order of Roman priests, would gather at a sacred cave where the infants Romulus and Remus, the founders of Rome, were believed to have been cared for by a she-wolf or lupa. The priests would sacrifice a goat, for fertility, and a dog, for purification. They would then strip the goat’s hide into strips, dip them into the sacrificial blood and take to the streets, gently slapping both women and crop fields with the goat hide. Far from being fearful, Roman women welcomed the touch of the hides because it was believed to make them more fertile in the coming year. Later in the day, according to legend, all the young women in the city would place their names in a big urn. The city’s bachelors would each choose a name and become paired for the year with his chosen woman. These matches often ended in marriage. 

http://www.history.com/topics/valentines-day/history-of-valentines-day

Sacrifice and basically a woman lottery? How is that romantic? The horror lover in me thinks that this theory is sort of cool but I still don't get how people turned this day into a day of love. I've decided not to resent this day but to celebrate February 14th as another Halloween. 

Flirting With Wickedness

Flirting with Wickedness  

There was once a girl who flirted with wickedness.

People told her not to stray from goodness;

that her soul should stay the purest,

but she didn’t care.

She let darkness caress, embrace her,   

Evocatively whispering sweet nothings in her ear:

“Come on, you’re so beautiful…Come here and play.”

And without any fear,

she grinned and asked,

“Is that a dare?”

While other girls would’ve clung onto their innocence,

She just gave into sinful tendencies,

acting on demented urges;

The virgin now having an evil within her that no one could purge.

She drank the most dangerous poisons,

She covered her body with blood and sweat;

Dancing lustfully and disappearing into the night,

Laughing out of insanity and spite.

Now, she’s in every horror story;

Monstrous and gory.

Now, she’s in your mind,

Haunting, taunting;

Driving you insane.

You can hear her say so seductively,

“Come on…come on Darling, play with me.”

  

   

(c)Lena Holdman, all rights reserved 2015

Once Upon a Fairy Dream

Fairy Tale 
To dream that you are a character in a fairy tale suggests your need to be rescued or to be swept off your feet. It also indicates that you are exploring your limits and trying to awaken your fullest potential. 

Fairy 
To see a fairy in your dream indicates that you are in search of some help or advice for a problem or decision, but may not want to directly admit you need help. In particular, if the fairy is evil, then it suggests that an aspect of yourself needs to be set free. The fairy is also symbolic of your soul and the feminine aspects of yourself. 

Falling

To dream that you fall and are not frightened signifies that you will overcome your adversities with ease. 

http://www.dreammoods.com/dreamdictionary/f.htm 

Once Upon a Fairy Dream 

 On January 21st, I had the coolest fairy dream! Let me tell you about it. Shrinking to the size of a butterfly, I fell into a mirror, into a fairy land. I didn’t know what was going on at first but I met a fairy prince named Zack and we became friends. Zack was thin but muscular and had long, platinum blonde hair.  He saw how strong I was, so he asked me to help him search for a mystical gem that was stolen from the fairies by murderous ghouls. The hideous ghouls were transparent looking but their bodies were skeletons and their heads were smiling skulls that constantly chattered their teeth together with a taunting, clicking sound.  When we finally found the gem, we had to battle the ghouls. Zack tossed a wand to me and I helped him fight them. We sapped them with lightning bolts and they poked us with wooden sticks that had silver, sharp points on them. The points on the sticks really hurt but I never got injured, only Zack did on his arm. I don’t know why. After a long battle, we won and the ghouls vanished. We returned the gem to Fairy Land and we were heroes. Then, over time, Fairy Land became my home and I fell in love with Zack. I had to learn to be a princess. I know, it totally sounds like a sugary, Disney movie but it was fun.  

(c)Lena Holdman, all rights reserved 2015 

How Are You Steven?

Hi Steven, 

How are you? I was just thinking about you today. Do you remember the parties that we had at school? It was so fun. You made everyone laugh with your silly jokes and comments. On your birthday, we always ate White Castles. Now, every time that I smell White Castles, I smile. Oh, my niece Gracie did something that reminded me of you. She was pointing her finger at me, saying,"I'm not touching you, I'm not touching you" like you used to do to me. She got it from a movie but I had to laugh. Well, I just wanted to say 'Hey' and that we all miss you and love you. See you later Stevie Wevie. :) 

Love, 
Lena 

Mr. CreepyPasta's Laughing Jack

Mr. CreepyPasta is a horror storyteller on YouTube. According to the story, Laughing Jack began with a lonely boy named Isaac in 1800's London. Isaac's parents were very abusive and he had no friends. On Christmas Eve, a guardian angel gave him a magical Jack-in-the-box. The colorful clown was alive and was his best friend at first. Isaac was happy for the first time. 

Then three months later, while they were playing, Jack killed a cat. Isaac got blamed of course, and was sent to boarding school. Jack was left behind in the box. Isaac promised to come back for him but as time went by, Isaac abandoned him and Jack's colors went darker. Isaac's parents had died and he was now grown up. Jack then saw that Isaac was now a serial killer and because Jack's personality changed with Isaac's, Jack became a killer clown and murdered Isaac. Jack now eats and murders children. (The expanded, gorier story is told in the video above). 

This second video is another story about Laughing Jack. 

I heard about Mr. CreepyPasta from a SmallWorlds player and I got curious so I looked up the CreepyPasta Youtube channel. There are a lot of stories like this. They're like online urban legends. I won't lie, when I first watched the video last night, it scared the crap out of me. I'm obsessed though. :) These stories are very well-written. They're so cool!  

Christmas Eve Angels

Christmas Eve Angels

On Christmas Eve, while the entire world is sleeping, a miraculous event occurs. Beautiful, radiant angels come down from Heaven to Earth, dressed in long, flowing, red or green Christmas robes with large, remarkable, white wings. They come to visit to check on loved ones that they miss and bless the faithless and the dying with luminous hope and love. Mostly, they visit to express their joy and devotion to Christ on His Earthly birthplace. They dance in circles and sing their praises.

People on Earth aren’t supposed to see angels visit but one Christmas Eve, a curious, little girl heard the angels’ lovely voices and wandered outside. This five-year-old girl was named Ariel. She was wearing a long, white nightgown and her auburn hair was tied in a ponytail with a baby blue ribbon.  Despite the dirt smudges on her cheeks, she could’ve been mistaken for an angel, for faith and beauty brightly shined in her eyes. Sweet Ariel’s family was very poor. They didn’t have enough money to buy gifts for each other and despite her being so young, she didn’t mind. All that she wanted was for her mommy and daddy to be happy and not worry about money. 

At first, when she saw the angels, she wept fearfully, thinking that they were scary ghosts. To a child, they glowed with supernatural light and looked strangely imitating. Then, a woman angel named Dina with luscious, long, blond hair and gorgeous blue eyes rested a hand on her shoulder and assured her that they meant no harm. With a loving, soothing voice, Dina told the girl: “Do not fear Ariel. We’re here to bring joy and love on this glorious night.  We’re angels, here to celebrate Christ.”

Dina then flapped her wings, making a loud, swooshing sound and causing Ariel to giggle. “Do you really get to see Jesus?” Ariel asked innocently.

“Yes Child,” Dina replied with a smile.

“Does He really love everybody?” Ariel asked again.

“He loves all of His children,” explained Dina warmly, “no matter what. His love is never limited.”

“I love Jesus!” Ariel blurted out with a kind of adorable excitement that only children can get. The angels laughed and invited her to dance with them.

She ran around, twirled, laughed, and sang happily with the angels in the falling snow until she fell asleep peacefully on the ground. The angels making her hover mid-air, they helped her into the house, went upstairs, and put her into the bed without disturbing her. 

She gracefully landed in bed and Dina was about to tug her in when she saw that Ariel’s blanket was torn and had nothing but holes. With a wave of her hand, Dina mended the blanket and touching Ariel’s forehead, she whispered: “Goodnight Ariel. Have a blessed Christmas and may the Lord always watch over sweet soul and your family.” Then, she and the other angels flew back up into Heaven.

On Christmas morning, Ariel told her mommy and daddy what happened but they only said: “It was just a wonderful dream, Honey. Angels stay in Heaven.” No one believed her but she knew in her heart that the angels were real and she never forgot Dina, the exquisite, kind angel. From then on, she told the story to anyone who would listen to remind them the spirit of Christmas. 

(c)Lena Holdman, all rights reserved 2014 

 

Merry Christmas 

I Completed Online Class!

I graduated from my online poetry class! Here's the certificate: https://www.coursera.org/maestro/api/certificate/get_certificate?course_id=972128 I'm so proud of myself. I worked so hard but it was fun!